Transcript of conversation between Nyx and Beau
NYX
"Hmm... I wonder if anyone is home here.. Why live all the way in the woods?" she knocks on the open back doors "Hello?"
Listens for a response "... Nothing. Maybe no one is home? I wonder if they would mind if I took some food hmmm"
BEAU
He's entirely too busy, it's probably just housekeeping from down the way regardless
NYX
she sneaks into the back of the house and over to the fridge to rummage around
BEAU
cleaning off older drives and slotting them back in the server rack, these MUST stay on.
NYX
she opens the fridge and starts to look around to see what is edible
BEAU
it's at this moment he realizes - I don't have housekeeping out here...
NYX
has grabbed some strawberries and is eating them while she looks through the fridge still
BEAU
slotting the last drive in its place, he sighs before taking his hand off the machine and reaching for a knife in his jacket
NYX
"Hmm... There's not really anything premade, and I don't really want to use their kitchen... but I'm still hungry" She sighs and closes the fridge, the box of strawberries in hand
BEAU
standing in the doorway, he uses his free hand to turn the kitchen lights on "should I even ask? Like honestly?"
NYX
"Eeek"
BEAU
glaring
NYX
she drops to the floor and hides behind the counter
BEAU
"I can still see your tail, dumbass"
NYX
She yoinks her tail down "Sorry! I uhm, was just hungry? I'm leaving"
she pokes her head over the counter "Sorry. Leaving now, yes"
BEAU
he just puts his hand over his face "gimme one reason to not stab you to death right here"
NYX
"You uh, really shouldn't leave your doors open sir"
BEAU
"you broke into dramatic gasp MY HOME!!!!"
NYX
"Uhm... I'm homeless and hungry? You don't want to kill the needy right?"
BEAU
"and another gasp ATE MY FOOD!!!"
"ohhh the poor and less fortunate came to visit me!"
NYX
* she peeks some more over the counter* "You... seem very dramatic"
BEAU
he puts the knife away "so wheres the camera? is this some 'what if scenario' tv show?"
NYX
"What's a camera"
BEAU
"ohhhh you poor poor bastard"
NYX
blink
BEAU
"for someone homeless, you sure wear a lot of gold"
"I've met insurance salesmen who lie better" whispering "and they're like... really bad"
NYX
"Well. I wasn't always homeless. I.. fell into a ritual circle to another plane, and now don't know where I am"
BEAU
"hmmm"
NYX
"Hence being homeless"
BEAU
"so you took drugs"
NYX
"I have no idea where home is"
BEAU
"and had a bad trip"
NYX
"...no, I was summoning a familiar when I was stabbed and fell"
A sea green butterfly with sparkles falling off it can be seen flying off her hair and around her head before settling again
BEAU
"This seems like homeless terms for 'I was rolling a joint and the local crackhead stabbed me for taking his laying spot' sound about right?"
NYX
"... whats a joint"
"or a crackhead"
BEAU
A random laughing track can be heard from the garage, followed by frantic clicking noises of a tablet "Ignore that."
"so you're actually homeless then?"
NYX
her ears flick toward the noise "Yes, I have no idea how to get back to my home right now"
BEAU
"Have you considered getting a home?"
"real-estate is cheap right now" backhanded talk "take it from me"
NYX
"... I don't exactly have skills beyond some magic right now, I have no money or anything"
"I think I at least need something to buy a home with yes?"
BEAU
"just... remove the previous owners?"
"See, you're overthinking everything"
NYX
Her tail swishes behind her "I don't really want to kill them if they've not done any harm to me. So That's not really an option. Nonetheless, the neighbours would notice something"
BEAU
"kill the neighbors then"
"no wonder your poor"
"your entire social class loves to complain and beg, yet offers nothing in return nor any actual drive to get themselves out of the hole they put themselves in"
NYX
she stands fully and crosses her arms "... Do you ar least know of a secluded enough place that I can just "rehome" to my own then"
BEAU
"my taxes (that I pay fully and fairly) go to fixing your filthy ass, yet here you are stealing from me anyways..."
NYX
"I did not put myself here, thank you. It's not like I wanted to be here"
BEAU
in the most new york accent "calm down now robin hood itll be ok now dont worry"
"oh you want a job!"
"wonderful!"
NYX
she eats another strawberry "Sure, I need money"
BEAU
"stay put kitty"
NYX
"..."
BEAU
he runs up stairs, sifting through documents labeled "GCD" to grab a map of the area
NYX
she sits down and keeps eating the strawberries
BEAU
dramatic slam on the table
"HERE!"
"A village to the west, theres a home on the outskirts"
NYX
she looks at the map
BEAU
"now the current person there, they are baaaaaaad news ok?"
NYX
".. Sure"
BEAU
"They can't just be kicked out no no, you gotta get rid of them like.. fully"
NYX
does not believe him but has been asked to do worse
BEAU
"you may notice they don't have blood, it's errr... part of being poor or something"
"if they dissolve into weird computer stuff it's cause they're high"
"your reward? A free home and a pardon!!!!"
"how's that sound, you filthy, useless, piece of garbage stray kitten?"
NYX
"... Uh huh. Sure, this is actually still in my scale of not super weird so fine... and call me that shit again and I'll scratch you and show you "kitten""
BEAU
"I will fucking kill you."
":D"
"I will rip your throat out through your chest and neck and feed it to my bird. I don't even have a bird yet"
NYX
blank stare (he's not nearly as scary as master was) "Do you require proof of him dead?"
BEAU
"nope!"
"I'm just gonna expect you to do it"
NYX
"Time limit?"
BEAU
"Whenever I get bored!"
"Listen, if I show up one day and this dude is alive, I'm curb stomping him on your porch"
NYX
she stands from the stool, still holding the strawberries "Well, I need a home. And you need someone dead. Honestly not the weirdest thing i've been asked to do. Thanks for the job and strawberries hun" she moves around him to leave out the back door
BEAU
he's blankly staring at the counter, talking to somebody else
NYX
she waves as she leaves through the open back door again "I'll see you never hopefully"
BEAU
"I hate homeless people"
"time to do rich things"
he goes out to his mailbox and reads his tax papers.... and promptly throws them in the ocean
he will face no government backlash, this will probably hurt that furry more than him anyways
Witten by Kat and Dec (Server Owner)