...okay, we're recording? Keep it like that, BD. Okay cool. Uhm. Hi. So…Stedus says I should probably get my thoughts out somehow, if they’re bouncing around in my head like this, and uh. Someone needs to talk about that new stuff that the Pykes hit me with, and well. Uh. I’m the only one who took the hit bad enough to feel it, so I guess that’s gotta be me.”
“Also I did kinda bad and should - own up to it. So hi, Masters and Knights. It’s me, ya boy, Vels. You know the basics of what happened with the mission to………Kolca II, right. But I should tell you a bit more about the grenade thing. It, well. It sucked!!!”
“Like, it exploded into a cloud of - spice, I think? Not cool. Winners don’t do drugs. Unless they’re mild and non-addictive substances for recreational or medical use! Uhm, anyway. How do I put this…there’s-”
“Have you ever had something you didn’t start hearing until it stopped? …Like, a ringing in your ear? There’s this - thrumming. Like a drumbeat. I feel it all around me. And it pulses - especially when I’m at work on a machine. I think that’s - what the Force is, to me. I didn’t know for sure, until it went silent. That’s what happened when that grenade hit me. It just felt - silent. Like there wasn’t anything there…”
“That, and the uh, hit to the head I took, made me kinda lose it. Pretty sure I cut someone down. Pretty sure I freaked out and swung my saber everywhere. I just - totally couldn’t handle the pressure. And then when we got back to town, and we saw that jerk who hurt Alex, I’m - pretty sure I wanted to kill him. Like, really bad. I was so mad I barely remember anything I said, but Atyuna said it was pretty intense. Then I just kinda ran at him-”
“And uh. We got into a huge fight that almost got us all killed. So. I’m sorry. I didn’t even know I could get that angry. I guess anyone can, huh? Not that I’m saying that makes it okay, or anything, but I don’t think being under the effect of that grenade or the head injury are excuses. I mean it probably didn’t HELP, but.”
“...Even now I still get all twisted up in my stomach when I think about that guy. Cad Bane. People who treat droids like garbage are hard for me to forgive. I guess…that’s my issue I gotta work on. Um. Okay. Yeesh, this is embarrassing. I’d rather clean the exhaust ports on the fleet.”
“That, um, wasn’t a suggestion! By the way! Crap. End log.”