[Pine]
It would be during the trip
around the foothills of the Icespire Peaks that Pine would fall back
from where he had been walking in order to fall more in line with
Zenari, seeing an opportunity to speak while others were distracted by
their own concerns.
"Much has been said, and theorised, about the
creature that you carry within you," he said, not seeming to be
bothered with mundane niceties compared to merely getting to the heart
of the matter, "but I have not heard one person yet question whether you
wish to do that carrying, or if it is a good idea.
"You have
no memory of agreeing to any of this, as far as I can tell. There was
no consent, no agreement that you, as you are now, have made. This
creature is using you, no matter its intentions. Its presence poses a
threat not only to your life, but of everyone in this area should those
seeking it find you. That is a vast burden, and I think your good
nature is being used for its purposes, ones you did not agree to."
He lets his gaze drift back to the mountains, lingering there for a long moment, before turning back towards her.
"I
have come recently to question my own wishes, my own desires for the
future and what I want to do with it. You have stated clearly that you
wish to help people, but your host of this creature, it does the
opposite, except perhaps for it. I thought to put to you, since no one
else seems to, that trying to get rid of this possession might also be
an option."
[Zenari]
Zenari would listen quietly
and ponder his words. Unsure of how to express her thoughts she would
try to put it into words. "It seems there is much more for me to learn
about this. The difficulty is that I don't know where the separation
between me and this spirit starts, if there even is one. I don't even
know if it is me that wants to help people or if it is the spirit. What
if separating it from me would also change me?" She would pause. It is
clear this is something she has been thinking about and it is hard to
hear her words when she continue. "What if me is not a good person, what
if my powers would stay with me when the spirit leaves and I would use
them for... evil" The last word is barely a sound at all.
[Pine]
Pine
would give her space to find her words, and listen when she did speak.
When she was done, he did not immediately dismiss the concern out of
hand as many would have done. He had seen many types of people in the
world, and those that had passed. He tended not to harbour unrealistic
expectations of the world or those in it.
"I think it unlikely,"
he said at last, his gaze on the trail ahead, still pondering, still
turning the puzzle over in his mind. "I would think if your behaviour
had changed so utterly, the creature would have had to have taken over,
and so it would not be you I would be speaking with, merely the creature
in a vessel. No, I think it far more likely that like called to like,
and you were chosen because you were similar, so the dissonance of
carrying a parasitical entity remained unnoticed for as long as
possible."
He sighed, and turned to look back at her, slightly
troubled by the look of him. She had travelled long enough to have
picked up the way his ears would turn, and his body posture to know that
he was slightly uneasy, likely with the topic despite having brought it
up in the first place.
"From what we know, it is a creature who
has fled from the natural order of its home plane. Those that do so
take refuge in the bodies of a ... monastic group? I cannot recall. But
you are not in a group like that, and have not agreed. If you had
agreed, why do you not recall? It's hiding something from you. Perhaps
your lack of agreement, perhaps something else. I'd be wary of someone
like that as they will likely be untrustworthy. Why hide from you, if
its presence was agreed upon?"
He frowns, his tail twitching back and forth, displeasure at that thought.
"I do not like the thought of this hidden entity behaving like that."
[Zenari]
Zenari looks up at Pine a bit more calm than before as if to sooth his uneasy.
"I
was found as an infant and there is no reason to not think that this
spirit was with me even then. I think that somehow I was born with it.
Perhaps it is my parents who agreed to it and somehow it was transferred
to me. Either way I don't feel like it is an intrusion. My whole life I
have felt a present with me but never realising it was something inside
me. I have always thought that maybe it was my parents, somehow
watching me, protecting me, it made me feel safe. Now that I know what
it actually is I do in fact feel grateful to this spirit. I think it is
the spirit that has pushed me towards helping others and sometimes maybe
it has even been even though it put myself in harms way. In these cases
I have felt a push and need to do something even if it is dangerous,
the feeling of someone watching over me and help me has made me feel
strong and it gave me courage. If I were to remove that part of me I am
not sure I would actually do all this, I might as well just go hide in a
corner, in shame but safe. I think even though these other spirits are
hunting it and me I feel like it is right for me to try to protect it
because it has given me so much."
She looks at Pine again.
"I
understand what your thoughts come from but you don't need to worry
about me. I want to do this, to be this symbiosis but if I ever put you
all in a danger that you don't think is fair, just tell me and I will
think on this again."
She would continue look at Pine to see if her words seem to take away some of his displeasure and unease.
[Pine]
He
would listen, and as he did so, some of his visible unease would have
faded to understanding and acceptance, at least it would seem so, for
the start of that lashing tail had settled.
"I understand. It is
best to be sure of such things. I know of the push and pull of
choosing your own path, and of being guided. I just wanted to ensure
that your choice was one fully considered."
He was quiet for long
moments, looking out at the hills they walked through, the mountains
they skirted the base of. There were no dragons, nothing that
threatened, and at his side Zenari seemed content and settled within her
choices, and that was enough for him.
"It is like a friend. A
benevolent force at your side. I understand that appeal. I once
thought that about my own powers and the guidance that led me safely
from one task to the next, although less… present. I do not know if I
can still say the same. My path is unclear since coming to this
region. I miss the certainty."
[Zenari]
Zenari nods, understanding the feeling. "You'll find your way, even If it changes and transform from what it used to be."
[Pine]
He would nod a little to show he understood what she was saying, but appeared somewhat troubled by the notion.
"I
do not like the changes I have faced so far. My life has been one of
shades of the same pattern, and I now find the pattern almost
unrecognisable. It does not sit well with me."
He seemed to shake
off at least a little of his preoccupation in order to add, "At least
you have that hopefulness for the future. It seems as though with
answers your life is improving."